What Does Thriving Mean?

Thriving is developing the fullness of our strengths with and for others toward our telos—the purposes for which we have been created.  – Pam King

What does thriving mean?

Thriving means to grow into the fullness of your life – as your unique self, with growing capacities to be relational, to give and receive love, and contributing toward the greater good.

The word thrive has become so common in our culture that it can sometimes feel diluted in meaning. But it has become widespread for a reason—we all long to become fully alive as ourselves, to thrive, and we are in search of the path that will get us there. There is an intuition around the word that involves good growth and a kind of fullness that comes from bringing the various aspects of our lives into deeper integration.

In many ways we can think of thriving as a practice of growing whole. In order to thrive, we need to become resilient— develop the ability to adapt and bounce back in the face of adversity. But thriving people do more than bounce back. Thriving people grow into their strengths, learning about who they are for their own good and for the good of others. The nature of thriving is as complex as our humanity—there is no simple formula for living our fullest lives. Instead, the journey to thriving involves many interconnected facets.

What does spirituality have to do with thriving?

Psychological research has shown us that healthy spirituality supports a thriving life, helping people become more resilient, providing belief systems for making meaning, and at it’s best, healthy spirituality should support the development of deep reciprocal relationships. Research identifies crucial aspects of human development supported by healthy spirituality including, a loving connection with God (or the transcendent) and others, daily practices that bolster wellbeing and connections, and beliefs and narratives that support meaning and hope beyond ourselves. Healthy spirituality allow us to become agile and adaptive in all of life’s circumstances.

Thriving involves spirituality, and spirituality encompasses more than faith—it encompasses our relationships, daily habits, and our sense-of-self. 

Spirituality is most readily associated with faith in God or a source of benevolent love and traditional faith practices, but healthy spirituality that leads to thriving is multidimensional. It involves our beliefs, our feelings, and our behaviors. Beyond our faith, developing daily practices to support our spirituality, fostering a healthy sense-of-self, loving relationships, and a bigger purpose are all essential. Developing as a whole person in these aspects, with and for others, is how we come to thrive as our best selves. 

Thriving for Christians is becoming like Christ in our own unique way.

While Jesus is the example for Christians and Christians are called to become more like Christ, each person is a unique reflection of the image of God with a corresponding unique way to live out love in the world. This idea of living out love is both universal and unique to the individual. If faith meant behavioral conformity, how could God’s endless attributes be expressed in our world? True thriving is when we are able to grow into our unique selves, giving others freedom to do the same, using our individuality to partner together for a collective purpose of living out love in the world.

Signs of a Thriving Life

Thriving people experience deep, abiding joy.

We naturally want to fill our lives with as many people, circumstances, and events that make us feel happy. However good it may be, happiness is a momentary, fleeting emotion, and needs to be undergirded by deep, abiding joy. Happiness brings good feelings during the good times, where joy, which is deeply tied to what matters most, is able to rise to the surface even in the midst of suffering and tragic circumstances. Joy is tied to meaning and connection, empowering us to understand and pursue what matters to us to support our thriving. 

Thriving people are relational people.

Thriving happens relationally, not individually—we thrive with others and we thrive for others. Although we are individuals, we are relational beings who are not designed to grow and develop in isolation. We are formed into who we are through our relationships. Growing into ourselves and giving back to our community and the world is an essential part of thriving. From a Christian perspective we are created in the image of God, and we mirror the relational nature of the Trinity. 

Our relationships are how we shape our sense-of-self, because the only way we can understand ourselves is through reflective feedback from others. A healthy sense-of-self, the story we tell ourselves about who we are, is essential to a thriving life.

Our connection to others is at the heart of thriving. We may live in an individualistic society, but positive, beneficial growth and thriving happen in the context of relationships. Our culture has come to place high value on the accomplishments of the individual, focusing less on the value of community, but growth that produces thriving is a relational endeavor.

Thriving people live with meaning and purpose. 

Thriving goes beyond performance and success. Striving for goals that are not attached to purpose or a meaning beyond ourselves can lead to burnout, among other mental, physical, and relational strains. When the motivation for our work and efforts connects us to something that impacts a greater good, this purpose and meaning produces a joy and resiliency that leads us towards thriving. 

Thriving people grow at a sustainable pace.

While thriving involves growth and development throughout our lives and there may be seasons of vigorous growth, much of our growth journey is simply about intentionality and consistency over time. Our pursuit of personal development should be a sustainable pace and intensity. 

Thriving is a process of transformation over a lifetime.

Thriving does not have a finish line—thriving is a lifetime process of transformation. To think of thriving as having an end point can actually lead to disappointment and undercut our ability to be resilient. Believing we are supposed to arrive at a place of complete balance, joy, and perpetual agility would produce discouragement rather than health. Accepting that life is complicated and full of surprises and disappointments isn’t giving up. Instead, we learn that we will constantly be navigating unpredictable variables within our evolving selves and the world around us. Adopting this perspective of transformation instead of destination can perpetuate the very resilience we need to thrive.

What can get in the way of our thriving?

We all have our individual challenges, but we do share some commonalities of what can inhibit our ability to thrive. While by no means an exhaustive list, these are some things that can get in the way of positive growth.

• Trauma: Trauma distorts our understanding of safety and certain ways of thinking, creating emotional and mental barriers to the pillars of a thriving life. For example, someone who has had traumatic experiences involving people may be wary of others and struggle to develop meaningful relationships.
• Perfectionism: Perfectionism and other cognitive distortions can actually decrease our ability to be resilient and access joy by attaching negative consequences to anything less than our idealized standards. Being connected to a bigger purpose for our lives can release us from the burden of perfectionism. When our actions are attached to meaning, we maintain motivation to persevere amidst the imperfections and difficulties of this life.   
• Culture of individualism and isolation: With our increasingly digital world, it is all too easy to become isolated from valuable relationships and daily interactions with others. Because relationships are essential to understanding who we are, isolation is detrimental to individuals as well as to a thriving society.
• Pace of life: The pursuit of our best lives can find us in a state of constant movement with little down time to rest or reflect on if our actions are actually leading us towards what matters most to us for a thriving life. Adding margin for stillness and mindfulness gives us space to align our values and our actions. 
• Lack of fit within environment: Sometimes we can find ourselves in job environments, relationships, or communities that do not fully support our needs. During these times, we can explore ways to improve our fit within our current environment, or consider our options for how we can transition to an environment that is better suited for us. 
• Neurodiversity: The diversity spectrum of the human brain is astounding. Often, the world caters to a general area of this spectrum, which can lead people who fall outside these generalities to feel marginalized, with more barriers to resources for positive growth.

A thriving world needs spiritually healthy humans who can ultimately lean into love and live out love. We invite you to join us on this journey to pursue thriving—with and for others.

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