September 7, 2020

Resiliency Part 1: Bending not Breaking During Hard Times

Dr. Pam King shares 8 tips on how to simplify and thrive during challenging times.

A thriving mindset can direct and motivate us even amidst difficulties. I discuss more about thriving over the long haul in Part 2 of this series. Someone with a thriving mindset looks for opportunities—for a better way forward—whether that involves growth, rest, innovation, connection, or meaning. As you face challenges, consider them opportunities to define your short and long-term goals. When we identify the necessary goals in our lives, we are able to find a means to a greater end.

Here are some things to consider.

1. Distinguish what is necessary verses what would be nice.

Determine what you and your roommates or family members need to get through the challenge and imagine what you might need to thrive. What are the things that will help you be grounded, connected, and directed[1] as a whole and individually?

2. Be flexible.

As much as you try to make a plan, keep in mind that the only constant thing is change. It’s important to recognize that your solutions, routines, and systems may change depending upon circumstances. Note that things just might not work out the way you hoped, and that’s okay. 

3. Think outside the box.

Be innovative and find new solutions. For example, how can you use technology[2] to help you and others achieve goals and thrive? Be creative, but don’t forget to stay connected to what matters.

4. Don’t do it alone.

You don’t need to be Wonder Woman or Superman. Rally your team. Collaborate on identifying household goals, be clear on expectations, convey your values and appreciation for others, build trust, communicate often, and instill confidence in others. 

5. Be strength-based.

Allow the members of your household to volunteer and contribute to your home based on their strengths. If someone is the better cook in the family, allow them to be the chef. If someone else is a tech wiz, allow them to be in charge of all the technology in the house. 

6. K.I.S.S.

As the old adage says, “Keep it simple, stupid.” Don’t over complicate things. Identify small goals, and take it one day at a time. 

7. Keep perspective.

Remember there will be other seasons in the scope of a lifetime. Remind yourself that there is life and meaning to live into. Stay connected to your true north.

8. Be purposeful.

Covering the basics is a means to a greater end. When feeling overwhelmed, remind yourself that you are created for a bigger purpose.

Take some time to think how these guidelines might apply to you and those around you. Consider your physical, emotional, relational, and spiritual well-being. Create small goals and remain flexible. Put on a thriving mindset—see challenges as opportunities. Think of yourself as an agile, thriving ninja—one who can stay grounded, connected, and directed almost whenever and wherever.

For a free download of this practice, click here.


[1] Read my post to learn how you can be ground, directed, and connected: https://thethrivecenter.org/staying-grounded-connected-directed/.

[2] Learn how technology can lead to thriving: https://thethrivecenter.org/portfolio-item/technology-and-thriving/.

Pamela Ebstyne King Executive Director, Peter L. Benson Professor of Applied Developmental Science


Continue Exploring


Resiliency Part 2: Thriving for the Long Haul


A Practice: The Five R’s of Resilience and Recovery


Tips for Thriving Through Unpredictable Times

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